Grab that cash with both hands and make a stash

There's a slew of interesting, complimentary stories that have run in the Star the past few days on the state of the MLSE's profits (in a word: massive); their approach to scouting (in two words: horrifically cheap) and the wallets of the fan base (in three words: open for business)

In another must read, Ninja at Raking Leafs has pretty much covered off the key points and said everything that I was thinking.

Finding out that MLSE has a lifestyle that combines the best of Montgomery Burns and Ranier Wolfcastle is about as surprising as finding out another b-list celebrity "forgot" to wear gitch whilst getting out of her car.

That said, it's very disheartening that even a tiny slice of those profits aren't being redirected off-ice to make the Leafs better. The one advantage the Leafs still possess in a cap environment is the ability to outspend their rivals in off-ice activities such as scouting and player development. As a fan, I always hoped this was so - that this team was doing everything possible and was seeking out every competitive advantage to win. I suppose had I stepped back and looked at this club's history of drafting and developing players or had anyone (hello media?) just asked a few tough questions I would have known better...

In on-ice news, the Leafs beat the Rags 4-1 and Antropov just continues to pile on the points.

After this two-game trip, I'm looking for creative ways to keep the Leafs from playing the ACC again this season...

Cue the Ian Hunter...

I haven't been posting media links in a while. I presume that if visitors to my blog are desperate enough for Leaf news that they'll come here, they're already reading the papers.

That said, I think Tim Wharnsby's piece at Globe on Hockey is a great read. My only addendum to the article is how much I hate it when people respond to the notion of firing JFJ with the question, "But who would you replace him with?"

Think about that for a minute.

If someone in your organization has proven themselves to be incompetent and harmful to the company's bottom line, does anyone in your office step up and say:

"Yes, he has missed his targets for four years. His poor decision making skills and lack of foresight on market developments may have handcuffed our organization for years to come. He has consistently changed plans in mid-stream and still failed, but we can't fire him. Who are we going to replace him with?"

Look, I'm not a hockey insider and as such I have no real or informed idea of which hockey executives are available, respected and highly regarded. The same goes for 99% of the people having this conversation, but this is what specialized executive search firms are for.

One last item.

Let's pretend that MLSE has seen enough. After 10 games they have fired the GM and they have hired JFJ as the new GM. (Yes, JFJ - stick with me on this one).

At the news conference announcing his hiring, MLSE state that they honestly believe this team has the talent to not just make the playoffs but to compete for the cup and that JFJ has free reign to make this team better.

Looking at the on-ice talent, organizational depth, the team's play in the first 10 games of the season and the way this team has performed over the past 2 years, what would a newly hired JFJ do?

How would a newly hired JFJ (new-JFJ) differ from the JFJ (JFJ-lite) we have today?

Does anyone believe that new-JFJ would take a totally different approach than the one JFJ-lite is likely to take for the rest of his tenure?

Does anyone believe new-JFJ would look at this team and think - "Once we get healthy, this team is going to make a run and be a serious threat for post-season success."

Personally, I think new-JFJ would act very differently than JFJ-lite and make some serious moves to make this team better. Looking at the team's past performance, it's the only logical conclusion I can come to.

I find it really interesting that the same man might look at the same situation and come to totally different conclusions based on his date of hire...

Gonna Get Your Mind Right

Cool Hand Luke is one of my all time favourite movies. In fact, I wear #37 on my hockey jersey as it's Paul Newman's number in the chain gang.

That movie has taught me a lot of life lessons: while it may be possible for a man to eat 50 hardboiled eggs, you're better off if you're not that guy; one of the most important things to know is your own mind; the Flaming Lips can pretty much cover any song and it will be cool; it's not a good idea to box with a guy the size of George Kennedy and, most importantly, you can pretty much break any person's spirit by making them repeatedly dig and then re-fill a grave-sized hole in the hot southern sun, especially when their only reprieve is a night spent in "the box" (a closet sized, outdoor, solitary confinement unit).

I bring this up because I think the whole night in the box and repetitive hole digging will be my new answer to the question, "What the $%@!# can be done with the Leafs?"

Seriously.

Consider...

The next time Kubina chases his man on the PK up to the blue line, he'll spend a night in the box.

The next time Hal Gill thinks it's a good idea to lead the rush, it's a night in the box.

Raycroft even thinks about going down early - that's right - it's a night in the box.

In addition to helping my beloved Blue and White "get their mind right" (as the Captain in Cool Hand Luke so wonderfully puts it) repeatedly digging and re-filling a hole would make for great post-game visuals.

Need to know who's in the doghouse? Just look for the guy with a haunted look heading out to the ACC parking lot holding a shovel.

Think the Sens look goofy doing post-games on stationary bikes? Wait until you see the Woz, night after night, waist deep in the ground, surrounded by soil down on Bremner Boulevard.

So what if the players and their union don't like it - the NHLPA is such a mess that now is the time to strike...a few weeks of hole digging and sleeping outside and this team will be playing at least .510 hockey.

=+=+=+=+=+=

On Atlanta's fourth goal it was so nice to see Hal Gill try to lead the rush. Not sure what part of keeping the game simple and concentrating on defence-first that falls under, but those big juicy brains down at MLSE sure have some interesting ideas. Now that's some coachin'

It was also heartwarming that Jason Blake watched the play and then turned away from his check on that goal. Sometimes players take a while to fit in with their new organization, to change cultures and to really show that they are part of their new team. But that piece of lazy backchecking coupled with a missed assignment is all I need to see to know that Jason is now officially and firmly a part of the Blue and White. Welcome Jason!

On the good news front - is Antropov the biggest surprise of this NHL season? I got him late in my pool for just $0.30 and it's making me look like a genius.

How Low Can You Go?

Nice to see this organization adapt and learn from past mistakes.

Last year, the team blew a lead late in Buffalo and it was clear the coach should have called a time-out. This season, the team blows it again in Buffalo and the coach doesn't call a time out.

I wonder if it will be as refreshing as it was last year when Maurice steps up with his media Mea Culpa later this week.

==========

I once played on a baseball team that was so bad that the catcher was not allowed to throw the ball back to the pitcher. After every pitch (that wasn’t knocked into the outfield or bounced off some poor batter’s ass) the pitcher would walk towards home and the catcher would walk towards the mound, they’d meet half-way, exchange the ball and repeat until the 9th batter came up each inning or the down-by-11-runs mercy rule came into effect.

When there was a guy on third base that was a threat to steal home, the catcher would sit on home plate with the ball in his glove until the ump would get so fed up he'd forbid the kid on third from stealing home just so the game could resume.

Oh, and the team was sponsored by a discount cigar store.

Sadly, I’m not making this up.

This is the anecdote that came to mind after tonight’s game in Buffalo (that and maybe, just maybe, if the Leafs can recruit a hotshot motorcycle riding tough guy played by a young Jackie Earle Haley, they might have a shot at turning this young season around…)

Is there a hockey equivalent to sitting on home plate and only walking the ball back to the pitcher? Well, if ever there was a team in need of such a defensive stratagem it’s the 1974 Washington Capitals who gave up 446 goals Leafs.

The Leafs have coughed up 29 goals against in just seven games and a whopping 11 goals in the third period (good for 29th in the league).

Now, I hear you - in fairness to the Leafs, they have already played dressed for seven games this year, so the totals are a bit high - it would be more accurate to look at goals against average, so let's re-do the math.

The Leafs have given up 4.14 goals per game - good for 28th overall in the NHL (see, by averaging it out we made it much better - to 28th from 29th).

What about if we look at the Leafs on a per-period average? Well, it’s…um, it’s still pretty frickin glum:
1 period GAA 1.00 (23rd)
2 period GAA 1.14 (19th)
3 period GAA 1.57 (25th)

If that wasn't bad enough, the Penguins are 27th in GAA and they're giving up half a goal less than the Leafs each game. You know it’s not a good sign when you’re looking to Michel Therien for defensive coaching insights...

From Chamomile to Champagne

"I always turn to the sports pages first, which records people's accomplishments. The front page has nothing but man's failures." - Earl Warren

Not only did Warren blow the investigation into the Kennedy assassination, he also had really lousy foresight when it came to Toronto sports media.

Given the exceedingly low expectations for this year's edition of the Leafs, one would think Sundin's chase for the Leafs all-time goals and points records would be one of the biggest media narratives in this town.

One would think.

Instead of recognizing and preparing to celebrate such a noteworthy milestone, those poor ink-stained wretches (keypad RSI victims?) have filled their columns and air time with nothing but man's failures: preponderances on "the semi-annual JFJ gallows walk", "no hope in Leafs Land" and horrifically insensitive questions about "mini-slumps."

After a loss in game 2, the front page of the Sun (in "Jesus is Coming" sized font no less) told Leafs Nation to wait until next year.

Nice.

Now, I've waxed rhapsodic about Sundin in the past but I'm hoping Friday's papers finally step-up and are chock-a-block with coverage on the Big Swede's accomplishments (I'm hoping, but I'm not holding my breath).

Tip of the hat to MLSE: nice touch to name the guy the first, second and third star of the game. Well played.

chamomile nation

As I watched that debacle tonight, it struck me that maybe someone filled the Leafs' water bottles with some sleepy time tea. The stuff that Maurice has suggested fans stock up on.

I only watched the first two periods. Just like most of the Leafs, I didn't stick around for the third but I'll weigh in anyways...

Is anyone really surprised that the Leafs are 1-3 to start the season? I mean other than those fans who can't quite keep the shift key held done when talking about the Leafs!!!!1

Consider:

The 2006-07 Leafs were 25th in goals against.

The six D who were logged the most minutes for the Leafs last season:
1. McCabe
2. Kaberle
3. Kubina
4. Gill
5. White
6. Colaiacovo

The 6 D logging the most minutes this season:
1. Kaberle
2. Kubina
3. McCabe
4. Gill
5. Wozniewski
6. White

Last season, the Leafs were short handed the 11th most in the NHL. To keep it entertaining, the Leafs ran the PK like an old episode of Show Down, with the space around Raycroft’s glove filling in for the big foam targets. The Leafs PK (which might have benefited had it been coached by Peter Puck) ended up 27th in the NHL in 2006-07.

Top 8 in PK minutes last season:
1. Gill
2. McCabe
3. Kilger
4. Kaberle
5. Kubina
6. Steen
7. Stajan
8. Peca

Top 8 in PK minutes this season:
1. Gill
2. Kubina
3. McCabe
4. Kilger
5. Wozniewski
6. Devereaux
7. Stajan
8. Antropov

For those of you keeping score, you might be noticing a pattern here. In fact, 20 of the 23 players on the Leafs 2006-07 roster returned for the 2007-08 season, as did the entire coaching staff.

So where was this change going to come?

Toskala, Bell and Blake?

Really?

A career back-up, a third-line centre (who's been suspended for almost a fifth of the season) and a small forward (who's just been diagnosed with a form of cancer).

If that's the answer to what ails this club (and here's the question: how do you fix a team with a woeful inability to keep the puck out of their own net, discipline problems and a PK that puts "special ed" back into special teams?) Paul Maurice is going to need to get a plantation worth of chamomile tea for Leafs Nation.

Heaven holds a place for those who pray

Darcy Tucker, Leafs Nation turns it bilious eyes to you.

In game one versus the Sens, he turned the puck over to Fisher at the Ottawa blue line, never got back in the play and it’s a Sens win.

Tonight he takes a questionable penalty, Canes make it 3-1; turns the puck over at the blue line, Canes make it 4-1; takes another penalty to start the third, Canes make it 5-1.

I presume Tucker is hurt (I’ll give even-odds it’s a brain injury) as four games into this young season his numbers are positively Hatcher-esque: a team worst -5, pointless in four games, and the only thing he’s agitating are the fans.

How bad is JFJ’s decision to ink him to a multi-year $3.5M contract looking now? Perhaps Tucker will turn it around (and maybe Raycroft will re-discover his Calder trophy form).

81 More Games of This...

Question for the coach:

As the home team, you have the last line change and the ability to control line match-ups.

I was just wondering what hockey genius thought it was a good idea to match Tucker, (a notoriously weak ES player) against Heatley (notorious for owning your club) in a four-on-four situation with the game on the line?

The Final 25

Wow. This is it, eh?

Read over this roster, pause for a moment and ask yourself if this is really the best MLSE could do.

Forwards
1. Antropov
2. Battaglia
3. Bell (Suspended)
4. Blake
5. Devereaux
6. Kilger
7. Newbury
8. Pohl
9. Ponikarovski
10. Stajan
11. Steen
12. Sundin
13. Tucker
14. Wellwood (IR)

D
15. Belak
16. Cola (IR)
17. Gil
18. Kaberle
19. Kronwall
20. Kubina
21. McCabe
22. Stralman
23. White
24. Wozniewski

G
25. Toskala
26. Raycroft

First puck drop is Wednesday evening against the Ottawa Senators. I have a feeling this year's "Battle of Ontario" will be remarkably similar to the Battle of Fredericksburg (with my beloved Leafs as the Union, of course).

Go Leafs go?