Tuesday, October 23, 2007

Gonna Get Your Mind Right

Cool Hand Luke is one of my all time favourite movies. In fact, I wear #37 on my hockey jersey as it's Paul Newman's number in the chain gang.

That movie has taught me a lot of life lessons: while it may be possible for a man to eat 50 hardboiled eggs, you're better off if you're not that guy; one of the most important things to know is your own mind; the Flaming Lips can pretty much cover any song and it will be cool; it's not a good idea to box with a guy the size of George Kennedy and, most importantly, you can pretty much break any person's spirit by making them repeatedly dig and then re-fill a grave-sized hole in the hot southern sun, especially when their only reprieve is a night spent in "the box" (a closet sized, outdoor, solitary confinement unit).

I bring this up because I think the whole night in the box and repetitive hole digging will be my new answer to the question, "What the $%@!# can be done with the Leafs?"



The next time Kubina chases his man on the PK up to the blue line, he'll spend a night in the box.

The next time Hal Gill thinks it's a good idea to lead the rush, it's a night in the box.

Raycroft even thinks about going down early - that's right - it's a night in the box.

In addition to helping my beloved Blue and White "get their mind right" (as the Captain in Cool Hand Luke so wonderfully puts it) repeatedly digging and re-filling a hole would make for great post-game visuals.

Need to know who's in the doghouse? Just look for the guy with a haunted look heading out to the ACC parking lot holding a shovel.

Think the Sens look goofy doing post-games on stationary bikes? Wait until you see the Woz, night after night, waist deep in the ground, surrounded by soil down on Bremner Boulevard.

So what if the players and their union don't like it - the NHLPA is such a mess that now is the time to strike...a few weeks of hole digging and sleeping outside and this team will be playing at least .510 hockey.


On Atlanta's fourth goal it was so nice to see Hal Gill try to lead the rush. Not sure what part of keeping the game simple and concentrating on defence-first that falls under, but those big juicy brains down at MLSE sure have some interesting ideas. Now that's some coachin'

It was also heartwarming that Jason Blake watched the play and then turned away from his check on that goal. Sometimes players take a while to fit in with their new organization, to change cultures and to really show that they are part of their new team. But that piece of lazy backchecking coupled with a missed assignment is all I need to see to know that Jason is now officially and firmly a part of the Blue and White. Welcome Jason!

On the good news front - is Antropov the biggest surprise of this NHL season? I got him late in my pool for just $0.30 and it's making me look like a genius.


  1. Anonymous7:21 am

    Just remember what happens to Luke in the end! I think (as a former Leaf fan of 39 years) it's the fans that should be made to dig the holes after every lack-lustre, mind-boggling loss of the Leafs. Maybe they would get their "minds right" and stop cheering for a team that obviously doesn't care about their frustration.

  2. Yikes.

    You want me to dig a hole every time the Leafs blow an assignment?

    Go Oshawa Generals Go!

    Look for a new OHL blog coming soon...

  3. Anonymous9:48 am

    Yeah, those stupid Leafs fans supporting their team through thick and thin. Let's stop paying attention and then celebrate when our team wins because THAT is what sports is all about!

    Man, some people are just stupid.

    Your idea, however, is inspired. Much better than mine which involves just putting the bastards in the hole, shooting 1000 pucks at a tied-up JFJ, and a mass kidnapping of the MLSE board.

  4. Anonymous1:06 am

    I like ppp's idea - JFJ is the underlying cause of the mess... forgot getting him a 'mentor' and get him the F*&! out!

  5. Anonymous3:55 pm

    While I like to bash JFJ as much as anyone reading this blog, let's not make him the sole scapegoat. The underlying cause of the Leafs' ineptitude is not bone-headed decisions made on the ice, bad coaching decisions, or even bad managerial decisions. All of those things stem from the same rotten root; incompetent ownership, a problem that has plagued this franchise since Conn Smythe sold his interest in the team.

    It doesn't matter who replaces JFJ, they will continue to be hampered by the internal power struggle taking place in the MLSE boardroom. Until the corporate mindset that infects the halls of the ACC is replaced with a desire to win, simply for the sake of winning, nothing will change.

    JFJ should be fired because he has proven to be incompetent. However, if anyone truly believes that removing him will be the panacea to the Leafs's woes, they are mistaken.

  6. Anonymous4:06 pm

    I think you're taking a shot at me, but that's okay. You say, "support the team through thick and thin". Okay, but it don't matter whether support them or not...they don't care about winning (team, managment, JFJ, whoever). Supporting them is just allowing them to be mediocre, because why change when the fans keep coming back for more of the same crap. If true fans of hockey (not just some emblem on a sweater) stopped supporting a team that for 40 years (!) can't be bothered to care about the fans, I think you'd see a very vast improvement. Until the fans say, "Enough!" you'll continue to see sucky hockey at the ACC. Enjoy.